Hollywood Squares is back, and the show which features stars in a game of tic tac toe and trivia, hosted by Nate Burleson premiered this week on CBS/Paramount Plus.

This is a living post. Check back each week for more zingers and one-liners!

“It’s good to see Drew (Barrymore) here because that means she’s not out filming ‘Fever Pitch 2′”
Triumph the Insult Comic Dog.

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“I think they call Twitter X, because it behaves like mine. In the bedroom I could never get it to load”
Whitney Cummings

“Tom, why do you need a vasectomy. Can’t you use that mustache to keep women away?”
Jeffrey Ross to Thomas Lennon.

“So do all the Germans from the 30s”
Whitney Cummings on who likes Thomas Lennon’s mustache.

“That hair is not from Drew, it’s from a pony in Siberia”
Julie Bowen after being given an extension from Drew Barrymore.

“The man looks like Vin Diesel got lead poisoning.”
Triumph the Insult Comic Dog

“It’s the show ‘Everybody Loves Ray Jay”
Triumph on what Kim Kardashian’s first TV acting job was.

“American Horror Story or what it’s like to be Tyra Bank’s assistant” Triump (on the same question).

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“That’s all it’s going to take for Tiffany (Haddish)”
Jeffrey Ross after Nate puts 60 seconds on the clock.

“You look like a bottle of spicy mustard”
JB Smoove on Nate’s yellow shirt.

“Your momma’s p****”
Drew Carey on what tastes so good cats ask for it by name.

“You look like the mayor of the sun”
Pete Holmes on Nate’s yellow shirt.

“JoJo Siwa”
Drew Barrymore on who was seated in the middle of the “Last Supper”

“You are more stunning than the taser they used when I got to close to you.”
Triumph the Insult Comic Dog to Tyra Banks

“I was with Punky and then I got spunky”
Drew Barrymore on life after “Punky Brewster”

“Andrew has starred in one of the biggest Broadway shows of all time. Which means dozens have heard of him”
Triumph the Insult Comic Dog on Andrew Rannels..

“I’d like to four letter word the sexiest man alive my damn self. Heyyyyy”
Tiffany Haddish on the only other Sexiest Man Alive with an eight letter name besides Paul Rudd.

“I have heard of that place. There is definitely a buzz about it”
Margaret Cho on if d**** island is a real place.

“Cocaine Bear? To be honest, I don’t know a lot about bears. But I know so much about cocaine.”
Julie Bowen on what kind of bear you should play dead for if you’re charged by one.

“Ain’t no black people going on that ship”
Nelly on the Titanic II voyage

“Seven Italian guys leaning the other way”
Thomas Lennon on what the Leaning Tower of Pisa has “7” of.

“It’s more like Starsucks. Am I right?”
Pete Holmes on a report that has some customers waiting up to 40 minutes at Starbucks.

“You’re dressed like the lawyer for the Bee Gees”
Whitney Cummings to Drew Barrymore

What did you think of Hollywood Squares? Let me know in the comments.

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