One thing that veterans homelessness has done to me is rob me of my positivity. There is currently not an optimistic cell in my body. Optimism and hope can’t exist when you have nothing.

And worse, is that its completely erased my ability to believe in positive thought.

It’s tough. We’re often coached by people trying to help us to recite affirmations. To write those affirmations where we can see them. Those will help us through these tough times they say.

I’m sorry but that’s nonsense.

As I sit here with my faith in shambles and my confidence decimated, I just can’t believe it.

Keep your affirmations. Tell me where I can earn some money to get me out of this nightmare.

You need results. I can’t believe that anything about where I’m at is good. I have nothing. Don’t try to sell me that anything that is happening to me right now is good. Because you certainly wouldn’t trade places with me.

Do I still believe life is good? Yes. Which is why I’m fighting with all of my heart to make my only life as good as it can be. To find a stable home and an honest job.

A good life is one where you’re at peace and around things that make you happy. You don’t have to be a billionaire. I get it. But you need to be in a place where you feel good when you wake up in the morning and when you go to bed at night.

Right now, I’m filled with sadness when my eyes open in the morning, and when I close them tonight, I’ll feel the same way. And another day in my precious life will have been wasted in sadness.

Friends: Times are really bad. You can read more about my story HERE and help me out below. Thanks.

Next: Read about how I deal with constant imposter syndrome HERE